So, I woke up this morning with a bad case of PMS, and the song/show tune, “Cell Block Tango” in my head. The famous tune from Chicago where the women sing about the different ways they murdered their husbands/boyfriends, who were either unfaithful, abusive, or just assholes…(see link below).
My ex, and the father of my child is a verbally abusive control freak, and since we share a child, I’m stuck with that bastard for the rest of his life (he’s a lot older than me). My boyfriend now, is just as controlling, but he’s a nice guy. Its more of an anal tendency with him.
Lately however, the boyfriend has been getting on my nerves. Everything he does, just rubs me the wrong way. He’s one of these penny pinching people, where he even uses coupons to get a Big Mac at McDonalds. It’s maddening…
So the AC has been down for 3 days now and instead of calling a repair man, he thinks waiting for his friend to come and fix it for free, (not guaranteed that he can) is a better idea- at the expense of me and my dog who is a Siberian Husky. It honestly feels like we are dealing with the aftermath of getting hit by a hurricane, and we were too stupid and cheap to get a generator. Mind you, if I were to stick around with this person, I imagine this is what suffering through a hurricane would look like. Both my dog and I, are having bad hair days. I wake up and well, frizz is an understatement, and so is shedding when it comes to my poor animal who is molting. One would think by the clumps of hair on the floor, that she just started chemo or some crazy ex, put a hex on her. Ridiculous… She is constantly parked under one of those portable fans I just bought.
I am one of those people, who needs to have coffee in the morning, because if I don’t, I’m not very personable- I know, shocking. But it’s too hot to have coffee, and I’m much too tired to make that drive to Starbucks. Instead, I stare at my dog, and then at the coffee machine, then back at my dog, back at the coffee machine, and I do this for a good 2 minutes, and that’s how it started. “POP! Six, Squuuuishhh, Uh Oh, Ciceroooo, Lipschitz…”
I don’t know what’s more comical, the fact that that song came to mind, or that I began to sing it out loud versus in my head you know? I didn’t break out into a dance, because it’s too fucking hot for that, but I kept singing that refrain over and over, until I said “Fuck it! You need the coffee!” My ex had texted me, telling me he took the day off, and asking me if I could buzz him in a few.” The message made me turn purple because, he used the word “buzz,” which I imagine is his version of trying to sound all cool, and not like the abusive bastard that he is, and because people like him, shouldn’t be allowed to have days off.
So there you have it, be wary of the 2 types of control freaks- 1) the abusive kind, and 2) the anal penny pinching kind, because both, will make your life absolutely miserable! But most important, always remember to stay cool, because, we do crazy things in the heat of passion, the key word here being HEAT!
Here is the song for those who aren’t familiar with it- great song! Going to jam to it later lol